Dr. Dobb's Journal February, 2005
From the weekly AwareSoft SoftWare Small Successes Pattern and Buzzword Brown Bag:
Barney: Well, you'll all be happy to hear that I've been doing Corridor Politics with our Corporate Angel, as well as a bit of Whispering in the General's Ear and Bridge Building, and yesterday, I got a Royal Audience to Test the Waters.
Chas: That's great, Barney, because we need to Plant the Seeds, and the best way to do that is to Stay in Touch and Involve Everyone.
Annie: Not to mention getting a Guru on Our Side.
Barney: We need to do all of that if we're going to get Corporate Buy-In and build an Early Majority. But in today's Brown Bag, I think it's Time for Reflection. Would anyone care to Shine the Spotlight on our Strategic Vision?
Chas: I'll give it a shot, Barney. Basically, it's that all Stakeholder Communities within our Corporate Culture should embrace a Fear Less pattern regarding Digital Rights Management of our Intellectual Property.
Annie: Which means that we should Just Do It and Open-Source our Core Capabilities.
Chas: It all comes down to Total Cost of Ownership up and down the Value Chain, doesn't it, Barney?
Barney: You've got my Buy-In on that, Chas, but what do the rest of you Early Adopters think?
Rollie: I mean, like, for our Software Ecosystem, isn't Digital Rights Management basically an instance of You Aren't Gonna Need It?
Chas: Actually, it's YouAren'tGonnaNeedIt. Extreme Programming concepts are pronounced as one word with InterCaps. Patterns are pronounced as separate words, capitalized.
Fred: If this is a Brown Bag, shouldn't we adopt the Do Food pattern?
Barney: So in the spirit of Sustained Momentum and proceeding Step by Step, could someone articulate the proposed Business Model?
Chas: I believe the model is Give Away the Software and Charge for Support, Barney.
Barney: I'm going to invoke the Just Say Thanks pattern, Chas, because that's exactly right.
Fred: If we can afford to Give Away the Software, why can't we Do Food?
Barney: But as we all know, every Business Model serves the Core Values articulated in a Mission Statement. Anybody want to PowerPoint our proposed Mission Statement?
Chas: It's Zero-Prerequisites Software for Clueless Losers, Barney.
Annie: Uh, actually, I think that was a joke. Didn't we change it to Extremism in Ease of Use is No Vice?
Rollie: Uh-uh. That one failed to get External Validation. Red-State political references are okay, but Barry Goldwater is by current standards Too Liberal. The official proposed Mission Statement is Empowering Users through Transparent Functionality.
Barney: Right, Rollie. So I think we have Group Consensus. And if it's The Right Time, we ought to be able to get Buy-In from all the Stakeholders in the Corporate Family.
Fred: Well, you're not getting my Buy-In unless I get something to eat.
Barney: So in summary: Give Away the Software and Charge for Support, Zero-Prerequisites Software, Extreme Ease of Use, Transparent Functionality.
Chas: That's it, Barney. Is it time for Next Steps now?
Cyn: If I can just inject a contrarian note, I do see one problem with all this.
Barney: Well, that's why you're our Champion Skeptic, Cyn. By adopting the Personal Touch and engaging in Bridge Building, we can encompass a whole Greek Chorus of Devil's Advocates. Because if we're not open to challenging input, we miss out on the Holistic Diversity that comes from Q
Cyn: Here's what concerns me, Barn. If the business model is Give Away the Software and Charge for Support, then our viability as a company rests entirely on designing the software so that it needs a whole lot of of support. And it's not really clear to me how you reconcile that with those very nice-sounding Core Values.
Barney: Um, yes, well...Is there a pattern that applies to Cyn's input, Rollie?
Rollie: Yeah. Too Much Information.
Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge or five minutes of Googling, whichever comes first, there is no company named AwareSoft SoftWare, although there is at least one programmer using the name awaresoft in various forum postings. My use of the term is satirical in intent and maybe in effect and has no connection with any actual person or entity. In fact, neither does anything in this column.